This is something I absolutely must make the effort to visit when I live in Japan. A "must see" if you will.
Thank you BoingBoing for once again providing endless internet entertainment.
This is a classic post for Ryan. One of the best. I have wondered about this M3 Power thing for a while. Perhaps Ryan could post a review of his "Power Experience?"
This also reminds me of the Midol Monsteruation game and the poor self-loathing coder who had to create the game.
" … and now that dream is gone from me." I apologize, my Matrix: Reloaded jest wasn’t that funny. Har har.
I did really have a dream. The only thing that gives me pause in naming it a nightmare is the lack of rank terror that is to me what typically defines a nightmare. This dream was more subtle, more discomfiting, and in that way so much more terrifying than what I might call a simple nightmare. There weren’t any monsters or naked-at-school episodes or long weightless plunges from heights.
My dream took shape in the form of a wall—stationary, white, isolating. I couldn’t move my body, not even my eyes. I could only stare at the wall. An all-too-convenient dream-flashback informed me that I had been in a car accident, and that I was left utterly immobilized. Though my mind was perfectly intact my body could respond to my commands no more than might a statue. It was torture. I was stuck in this immobile form, and there was absolutely nothing I could accomplish of my own accord.
But there was hope. Weekly I had a trip to some sort of machine (my mind’s interpretation of dialysis?) that was able to drain me of my body’s toxins and give me a momentary lease to live life more fully. I could move! I could speak! I can tell you, the feeling of freedom when I was first informed of this miracle machine was something I can’t very well describe. But freedom in the dream is as fleeting as it is here in the waking world. You see, I could indeed walk, but only in a spasmodic and discomforting imitation of walking. I could talk, but instead of words pouring from my mouth I could form no more than a bestial yowl.
My family brought me to a nice restaurant during my few days of freedom. As is wont to happen in a dream, my entire high school class was there, forming some sort of gauntlet through which I was forced to walk to get to the dining room. It was hell. In waking, I like to think that I have gone on to bigger and better things than the majority of them. In dream, I was paraded staggering and twitching in front of them, unable to meet any of their eyes for the shame of it. I tried to tell them that I was still alive within this unresponsive shell, but I could only groan and gurgle. A much-disliked coworker was there as a waitress, exulting in my debasement. She saw me try to move my arms—I almost did!!—and her satisfaction at my self-defeat burned. What do I remember most about the dream? It was the shame, burning hot in my head.
In the end, the effect of the toxin-machine wore off. I ended up back in the hospital room, alone with the white wall and my own fevered thoughts. My family left. The nurse left. I was alone in a prison too small for my brain.
As I’ve come to expect in a dream, it drifted off into something much more blissfully mobile. But it wasn’t long before I woke up to my bladder’s protestations. I remember an intense wash of relief when I awoke in my own bed, able to move my eyes and my limbs, able to go to the bathroom simply by moving my legs, getting some flip-flops, and going. It is here that the dream coincides with nightmare, thanks to the feeling of elation when you wake up and realize that the fall you just took didn’t kill you, that the monster wasn’t catching up to you on the conveyor belt, that your girlfriend hadn’t broken up with your pathetic ass. It’s powerful. I came back from my bathroom visit, fully pleased with myself that I was able to do so without assistance. I lay back and started to fall back to sleep, and my body went numb. I cannot describe to you the terror that shot through me, the instant of absolute truth I felt that I would lose my body forever to this numbness. It was enough to wake me with the shock of icewater and keep me awake until I was absolutely sure that my body responded as I commanded. Have you ever awoken from a dream where you were sure that something was still in the room with you, in one of those shadows in the corners? Have you felt that unspeakable, irrational terror? Imagine that terror, but imagine that the only enemy is your own body.
I wonder if this whole experience was a warning. I could wonder as to its source. Internal or external warning, it doesn’t make a difference. I have lived my life too unaware of the dangers around me and the circumstances that wrap the lives of others. I am relatively sure that my own mind’s interpretation of physical handicap was dreadfully inaccurate. But the experience was enough to make me think, which I suppose is the point. How have I gone through my life feeling the discomfort that I know so many others also feel in the presence of the mentally or physically infirm? I guess I have been an asshole, unable to come to terms with the circumstances with which others are forced to live every day. I am fortunate in that I tasted the warning without living it. It was enough to make me think. I haven’t thought so much about a dream in my entire life. To this point I have made the mistake of avoiding the discomfort and ignorance I have long harbored for handicaps. I guess it has been a long-waiting change.
Note: This entry is by no means designed to offend or disparage. My facts on physical or mental disability are surely warped; I make no guarantee to accuracy. If you feel the need to correct or inform, by all means please feel free to comment. This post is authored simply as a personal epiphany to be shared with others.
Today I applied to be a member of the press at the Democratic National Convention here in Boston in July. It's actually quite exciting. It would be very interesting to be an observer to the track that will (hopefully) derail the Bush Train of Destruction.
Bloggers have been invited to participate as part of the press core for the DNC. I think they picked up on the importance of grassroots political movements via blogs thanks to the Dean movement. Blogging has become, much as the mainstream media may not like it, an accepted and booming media form. To tell you the truth, I get most of my news (thanks to RSS) via other blogs.
With any luck, I'll be able to access the DNC as part of the media and I can actually have some useful things to say on this site :)
Wow. This has to be the worst website I've seen in a long time. Ever since www.neurotic.com.
Well, I may have lost a post, but at least I'm not a pedophile ... a caught pedophile at that.
I mean come on, his name is Spanky. Shouldn't you have seen this coming?
More disturbing, this guy is 23. I guess my preconceptions have always been that pervs like thsi are old and scary. What a silly misconception.
I had a very nice entry written but Mozilla CrapFox decided to crash right at the end of the entry. So fuck that, I'm not rewriting. I've lost all creative flow to my rage. Maybe later, when I can think clearly through the fog of anger.
You can obviously see that I updated the look of my page. What with the wonders of CSS that I've been slowly learning thanks to a side project through work, I'm finally grasping the fundamentals of the "art" of design. Keep in mind that this doesn't at all indicate that I think I have any sort of "artistic" capability in my design. For that, take a look at The CSS Zen Garden or Mezzoblue or Stop Design, all of which have fantastic design schemas. My own page looks like a backwater 1998 webpage in comparison, but at least I'm adhering (loosely, I suppose) to standards, unlike what they did in 1998.
I personally like this new look. It's a bit more varied, a little less monotonous, and still minimalist. Oh and check out the groovy transparent GIF images for the navbar...now I don't have to change the actual images when I change color scheme. w00t!
Click the image to go to my handy-dandy Konqueror generated gallery.
Andy Tanenbaum on Linux Torvalds and the creation of Linux. A good read if you follow anything *ix.
Last night I was privileged to stand with 10,000 others in celebration of the first legal same-sex marriage certificates ever to be given in the United States. It was an historic, warming moment. The cheers that erupted from the crowd when the first couple emerged from the doors of Cambridge City hall was deafening, and the din hardly dwindled as the night continued.
I went with Ryan and his friend Christine to hand out flowers, as I mentioned in an earlier post. The crowd was so big that of course it took a lot of sneaking and friendly pushing to get through to hand out the flowers.
My personal irony of the evening was standing on a barrier holding up a sign that said "God Affirms You" (spells out GAY in rebuttal of a conservative sign that read "God Abhors You"). I've never had my picture taken by so many random people in my life, all of whom have no idea that I'm not exactly a God person.
It feels great to participate, and I feel honored that I was able to do so even in a small way.
Later in the day I'm sure Ryan will post pictures, so I'll make sure to link to that.
UPDATE: Here are some pictures on Christine's site. Ignore how heinously bad I look! They say the camera adds 10x the ugliness...
I love The Onion. Can't get enough.
Ever have one of those days, much like a "Bad Hair Day," where something about you is just ... bad? Well today is one of those.
It's a bad face day.
Unfortunate, to say the least.
Wow, I guess every time I say "I am Asian" I will be breaking trademark laws. How the fuck does this stuff happen? Thankfully, I'm not Asian ...
This world is truly messed up.
The minute I get to Japan I'm getting one of these. Hopefully there's a model without the stupid dog bark translator.
But a TV tuner, radio, SD memory slot, and a 1.3MP camera with optical zoom? Yeah. I'm sold.
Y'all suckers can keep your crapass American phones!
Head over to Rants to check out the newest rant on the whole low-carb fiasco. Enjoy!
Back in the day, a "carb" was something that denoted much less shame and fear as it does today. Back then, a carb was a hole on the piece that allowed you to "shotgun" your um ... green fun. I suppose that brought to some people a feeling of shame and fear, but those are the same people who think gay people are second-rate citizens and "family values" equals a whuppin' with daddy's belt. Fast forward to now, when the "carb" is the all-encompassing buzzword of 2004. It is respected. It is feared. It is fattening. At least, that's what all these Atkins idiots would like you to think.
I'm so sick of the Atkins craze. Every time I go to the grocery store, the newest "low carb" food has hit the shelves. Even fucking beer has submitted to the low carb thing. When you see "low carb offerings" in restaurants, it's just stupid. You go to a restaurant to eat something good and turn up your nose at health. When you go out to eat, you are treating yourself to something yummy not denying yourself. At least, that's how I've always seen it. But now, it's almost at the point where you can't buy anything that doesn't extoll its own low-carb virtues. Being that I am a skinny mofo and the last thing I need is to lose weight, I can use all the carbs I can get. Of course, guess what? Everything is low-carb now! Low carb soda! Low carb beer! Low carb soap I swear! LOW CARB FRIGGIN BREAD! That has to be by far the most idiotic thing I have ever heard. Bread is the very definition of carbohydrates. Why the hell would you want to eat bread that is low in carbs? I ate a low carb bagel the other day, because a co-worker was nice enough to let me eat it. It tasted like a dish sponge. Not, of course, that I would know what a dish spong would taste like, but you know ... I have a vivid imagination.
I can't wait until the next dietary craze rolls around. Then everyone will roll their lazy fatasses over to that craze and wreck their bodies. Do you people realize that it's not good to deny yourself carbs? It's essentially a form of starvation. Here's a grand fuckin idea. How about EAT WELL AND EXERCISE? I should patent that. I'll call it the "Nawrocki Diet." Hopefully I won't slip on ice like Atkins did, but maybe I'll be able to ride the train of insanity that Atkins started. Better yet, I'm going to cash in on this low-carb bullshit and start selling food that has low crab written on it. I bet you had to read that twice. You see, it says low crab. But idiots that they are, people will see it near the low carb section, and grab whatever food this is, and realize just how yummy it is, and gorge their pudgy selves. They'll say "this is the best low-carb food I've ever had! It doesn't taste like cardboard like that other stuff!"
My revenge will be that they realize that low-carb is a total farce, and I get rich. And I can't get busted for falsified advertising ... right?
Ah Ryan, how precious.
"Elated experiences" haha. At first I thought "ahh CIA operants must be proficient in hoobage!" Then I realized it was something entirely different ... and much more sinister.
Dun dun dunnnnnn.
I can't stand this shit anymore. No wonder they want to gouge out our eyeballs.
I find this site distinctly amusing because
I am pathetically and unabashedly geeky
It's so true
It's so damn comprehensive
It's just funny as hell.
My personal favorite (thus far) is found in Section II: 78. "The Free Love Utopia, populated only by fabulously good-looking people, that somehow remains free of sexually transmitted diseases, has no relationship turmoil, and is not inundated with hordes of people looking for easy sex."
It's a rather humorous piece, but the part on the bottom is sad sad sad:
Those people who still support Bush after all the bullshit he has put us through believe things that are simply not true.
"Among those who perceived experts as saying that Iraq had WMD, 72% said they would vote for Bush and 23% said they would vote for Kerry, while among those who perceived experts as saying that Iraq did not have WMD, 23% said they would vote for Bush and 74% for Kerry."
I weep for this once proud nation.
A selection of acts by our fine military men and women in Iraq:
c. (S) Forcibly arranging detainees in various sexually explicit positions for photographing;
d. (S) Forcing detainees to remove their clothing and keeping them naked for several days at a time;
e. (S) Forcing naked male detainees to wear women’s underwear;
f. (S) Forcing groups of male detainees to masturbate themselves while being photographed and videotaped;
g. (S) Arranging naked male detainees in a pile and then jumping on them;
h. (S) Positioning a naked detainee on a MRE Box, with a sandbag on his head, and attaching wires to his fingers, toes, and penis to simulate electric torture;
i. (S) Writing “I am a Rapest” (sic) on the leg of a detainee alleged to have forcibly raped a 15-year old fellow detainee, and then photographing him naked;
j. (S) Placing a dog chain or strap around a naked detainee’s neck and having a female Soldier pose for a picture;
k. (S) A male MP guard having sex with a female detainee;
This is the real thing. Not like any Bush (or anyone at all for that matter) fans read my site, but maybe it'll make you think twice about our presence in a country we never should have attacked in the first place.
Me. I am the next Steve Jobs.
I had this sudden realization (well, this has been a known fact for some time, but one that I hadn't really given any real thought to until today) that the computer industry needs a good swift kick in the ass to up its "cool" factor. You see, there's this whole "geek" stigma that isn't going anywhere.
While my next fashion prediction is that geekiness is the next "in," I propose to bring the two together faster than they might naturally happen. The catalyst, you may ask? Me. Strictly because I have this apparently innate ability to see into the pop-cultural future of America, I should be the chosen leader for this new computing revolution. Steve Jobs, move over. Apple may be currently hip in the computing world, but seeing as the name for their next OS X update is called tiger (an undeniably gay and uncool theme), I think it's about time someone else took over and made computing cool again. Again? Hell, it's about time someone made computing cool for the first time.
I propose the uber-new Operating System, "Reptile." It's faster than Windows. More stable and prettier than OS X. Just as "tinkerable" as Linux without a billion dependencies and headaches. It runs on PC, Mac, Sparc, Alpha, Commodore64 ...
The first update for Reptile is "Sidewinder" in which we introduce to the world FLBAM (pronounced "Fuh-Blam" by ultra-cool company insiders, even though the acronym doesn't spell out like that), which stands for Free and Legal Bad Ass Music. Fuck iTunes and it's $0.99 per song price. We get you free tunes that is 100% legal and RIAA litigation-proof! Stick that in your craw and smoke it, metallica!
As CEO of ReptiSys, I promise to provide aforementioned kick-in-the-ass to the computing industry. Bill Gates is a stodgy old geek. Steve Ballmer is the same, as much as he might try to appear hip while he hops around on stage like a raging prostitute on speed trying to hype up some new overpriced undepowered Microsoft product. Steve Jobs attempts to be hip, but come on Steve, the black turtleneck and worn jeans have got to go. In his place I stand as the new hip computing king, ever on the edge of hipness thanks to my future-sight.
It's going to be a glorious month for ReptiSys when we release our first installment of Reptile. Look out for it, and don't forget to buy stock!
(Paid for by the Justin is on Crack Association)
May 17 in Massachusetts is when same-sex marriages are finally (and who knows for how long) legal. I'll be at Cambridge City Hall the night of the 16th (Cambridge kicks it off at midnight on the 16th) with Ryan and others just to be a nice guy and celebrate this state at least coming out of the fuckin dark ages. Surely "compassionate conservative" America will manage to fuck everything up, but one might as well attempt to be pleased with things for the two days it lasts.
The original idea is here.
Certainly old news for some, I just revived this awsome piece of psychedelic madness on my work computer for shits n' giggles. It certainly serves its purpose when you're sitting around staring at your computer screen. At least the screen could be "neato" right? Right.
Essentially it replaces your Windows wallpaper with visual warping and colors. Quite nifty.
This has me totally stoked, regardless of what monkeys like George Bush think of stem cell research. A natural tooth replacement for the teeth that have been predicted by multiple dentists to fall from my mouth in the years to come.
I can't wait for when I look like a toothless Alabama hick for a month and then pop one of these babies in there.
Grow me some teefs, doc!!!
Just read the first review. Read it all the way through. All I can think of is Carl from Aqua Teen Hunger Force saying "I don't need no instructions to rock!"
Oh and make sure you don't miss the "metal sluts" getting wet part.
My god ...
"... that song was by Loverboy, and Loverboy has always sucked ..."
I find this BoingBoing post highly amusing, considering the recent hooha about buddha-themed skimpy swimwear from Victoria's Secret. So it's offensive for nubile bodies to be clothed in Buddha, but it's not offensive to theme an entire amusement park after Buddha? I imagine there are nubile bodies swimming in the Buddha-themed wavepool, so what's the difference? Maybe Ryan could shed some light.